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PostPosted: January 5th, 2018, 9:45 pm 
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Last edited by Scorpion on January 12th, 2018, 6:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: January 5th, 2018, 11:40 pm 
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If you really do have such a fked up life Scorp, then BZ2 is not the place for you. The internet is no place to solve RL problems - its a temporary escape from them. In any case, nice story, but the damage is done. You are not allowed in our games, period. Please leave and never come back.

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PostPosted: January 6th, 2018, 12:07 am 
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Scorpion wrote:
Overdue as it is, here it goes. I sincerely apologize for my trangressions and the irreparable damage I have done to the bz2 community. It's amazing that we still have games going today after what I did. Thankfully we should see a lot of players coming back in Redux and I'm very happy for you guys about that even if you don't let me play with you.

I also want to apologize to the GEL empire. All the gay stuff I said about Tom was a troll to embarrass him, also something I did to stay in his games so he wouldn't kick me. Very unprofessional and indecent of me and I'm sorry. Snake also. I was very nasty when I first came back in September 2017 and I took it all out on him and several others. Sorry about that guys. It was nothing personal I was going through the worst time in my life. But that had nothing to do with you so that's on me. Not only that but back in 2014 I automatically sided with the Vearidons during a feud that they had with GEL back then. I laughed when Tom wouldn't take command or complained on all chat and when Snake wouldn't 1v1. Sly had posted a topic against GEL and I just rolled along and sang the song like everybody else. I literally cringe when I read some of the posts I made back then. I had no idea what was going on. I was just a little boy who wanted to fit in. Couldn't voice my own thoughts. Now I am forever loyal the GEL empire. Long live GEL. They might still be skeptical of this but do know Tom and Snake that I was really always on your side but I was too much of a pussy to say it, because I knew as soon as I said that Cloaket would eat me alive.

Everyone deserves an apology from me though. You guys are all good in your own way and I always thought that. I used to look at Snake in 2013 with such awe and I think it's incredible that I can beat him in DF, and even command sometimes today. It's like I'm competing with famous people and I just take that for granted.

I will try to list as many people I hurt as possible. If I forgot you then you know who you are, and do know that whatever I did hurt me more than it hurt you. When I came back in 2013 after a few years off I immediately acted like I was better than everyone when in reality I sucked ass. This made my name frowned upon in the zone. When you found out who I really was it didn't make it better at all. I think it was a good thing what happened though. Because I kind of brought the community together in a way that Cloaket, Sly, Snake, and Tom all agreed that I was a parasite, and that brought them together in a way. Now it is rare that I see a Vearidon and a GEL arguing with eachother.

Also in 2011/2012-ish when I didn't play I was trolling some strats spamming chatbox with random nonsense calling you nerds and playing loud noises on the bz2 voice chat which we used a lot back then until we one day decided to stop for some reason. I remember Luminess being very pissed about that. Sorry about that, Luminess. It was all part of some sort of superiority complex I had developed just because I was doing things in life and was getting popular in school and shit.

I should never have tried to hide who I was with "GreenGuy" which is a name I detest. It gave people a false image of me that I was a good guy when in reality I was the biggest perpetrator. That identity might have ended up becoming even more hated than "Gen.Dim" though. Arguably. The latter did a lot more damage to the game though. But they are the same guy. They are me. Yes, it's me. That's why everyone hates me now. I killed the zone. I tried to reconcile but I would slip back into my old ways as quick as someone trying to stop smoking 80 cigarettes a day. I actually even always kind of took pleasure in being the "enemy" of the zone. Like I thought I was cool and what I did was cool. I liked having that image of being the bad guy and that's fine but little did I know that what I did would hurt me just as much as everyone else if not more. No one wants to play with me now so it has to stop.

Anyways I want to apologize to the Balkans/Russians/Slavs as well. I never had any problems with these and they were always nice to me until I started throwing tantrums in their games and abusing everyone on all chat until they had no choice but to ban me. It's sad because I even remember playing my mod with you guys back when it was popular and hope you want to try my new upcoming one, Retaliation out as well. Supp, cobb, kebbz, MAX, dd, etc. All are nice people and I enjoy playing with all of you and I'm very sad that things ended up as they did because that's not what I wanted at all. Also Andrey, even though he's not the best player I used to ridicule and trash talk him and his brother a lot which I DEEPLY regret especially now. I hope you're ok Andrey and I'm truly sorry for EVERYTHING I said about you guys! I didn't like when people called me noob and you will never be anything back when I was bad in 1.2. Which is why even though I don't like having zaxon or Sinbad on my team I will not abuse them because they can learn. Andrey is actually pretty good when he's actually trying and isn't completely wasted drunk.

Even the Vearidons I want to apologize to. I really believe we got off on the wrong foot because behind the trolling facade you guys had I really thought you were cool people to be around and I liked your sense of humor. Although I do disagree on your views on GEL I definitely have no problem with any of you especially Cloaket who in this time, although I never really know if it's a troll or not with this fellow, actually stood up for me and let me play in all his games when everyone else was banning me. He even said he would include my Swarm race in the next VSR which I hope he still will. I've always liked Mort, he's a funny guy. Sly and me can have our differences, but he used to be the only Vearidon who was nice to me which I won't forget. Dom was always nice to me so I don't know why I always had to rip on him, probably because I was sick of getting owned seeing as he's very challenging to play against.

I also want to apologize to all the 1.2 vets who left the zone because of me. I ruined the game for you. Tabbing, lagging games, and AV'ing all day. Literally all I would do was sit there and ruin your game in one way or the other. Now that I can finally compete at your level I see what I was destroying and I deeply regret this. It's a disease. Unfortunately I'm still doing it today though. Not AV'ing obviously but ruining games. I'm killing teammates or bailing scouts through impulse and I immediately think "Uh oh what did I just do?" and regret it. I really don't know what I should do with myself. I guess I'm just a toxic person. I can't help it when I get into that state of mind. I always shoot myself in the foot before I even know it. I will do my absolute best to be good in the future though and I will humbly say that I have made some progress but it could definitely be better and I ruined everything for myself and what I had built with my recent "stunt". Sorry everyone who was involved in that. It was very childish and unprofessional of me.

You might ask "but why Scorp? why do all this?" but you see I'm not really normal. I was never a normal kid. I have a backstory around that. I grew up in a VERY dysfunctional household, been around some very toxic people that ruined my life. My childhood was as fucked up as you could possibly imagine and I was always envious at how good other people's lives were. I was mistreated and beaten, at school, at home, everywhere. I have been picked on and abused to an extreme degree. It was just defeat after defeat for me. I couldn't take it. I went insane. I literally lost my mind. I even lost a child. Which now I wish I would have gotten, even though I was very young, with my deterioating health now even at 21. In April 2017 something terrible happened to me and I'm still recovering. I won't say what but it was horrible. But really it's all gotten so bad. I've truly hit rock bottom. I was depressed suicidal a couple of months ago. I would have taken my own life but an inconvenience made it so I couldn't do it. All I have got to do at this point is sit here. All my friends have left me because I got "too weird" and I really need to fix this by socializing more. But that's my own stuff, and it HAS gotten a little better. By no means did all this give me the rights to take it out on you guys. If I had just talked about all this, then you could have listened and even sympathized. But all I wanted to do was bark, point fingers and blame everyone but myself. At least you can say it's all uphill from here.

Hope you all can forgive me. I completely understand if you can't. If you do forgive me though, DON'T forget. I don't deserve that.


Nice apology! Enjoy the MPIs :o)


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PostPosted: January 6th, 2018, 8:40 am 
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PostPosted: January 10th, 2018, 2:14 pm 
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Last edited by Scorpion on January 12th, 2018, 6:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: January 10th, 2018, 6:48 pm 
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A rat will do anything to save itself.


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PostPosted: January 11th, 2018, 7:53 pm 
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Mortarion wrote:
A rat will do anything to save itself.


Except for shoot at something more important than a scav without being told to "hold."

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 Post subject: Re: .
PostPosted: Yesterday, 10:47 pm 
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